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thirddeadlysin:

imanutcase-10:

tattooedzombigirl:

theman:

beardedmrbean:

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I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

Then bring me luck

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

invertebrates:

bogleech:

regular lobsters start out as just little lobsters but spiny lobsters start out as these beautiful weird larvae that also evolved to ride on top of jellyfish. This jellyfish is too small though!!!

imagine some other guy evolving specifically just to annoy you. what the fuck

poeticallybitter:

i want a love that tastes like poetry

pacey-grey:

I made a baby blanket for a pregnant woman at work and I went back and forth about it like “is this weird? To like hand make something for someone when we’re like friendly acquaintances not like bffs. God why are you so fucking awkward.” Anyway I gave it to her and she said she loved it and in the back of my head I’m like yea she’s nice and probably just humoring the weirdo. Well she texted me a picture this weekend of a scrunchy faced newborn at the hospital wrapped in the blanket I made her. And I’m like. Wow. She loved it so much she took it with her! To the hospital! To give birth! She wrapped her newborn it! I am just so filled with love and joy right now.

People will love the things you make them. Because you thought of them and you cared.

commander-snacks:

had a dream where my mom tried to give our Venus fly trap a spoonful of milk and it immediately started hacking and coughing like an adult human man

cock-holliday:

People who switch pronouns in songs to no-homo the situation are so funny. The idea literally never even occurred to me as a kid. Couldn’t be me. I am a woman scorned. I am a man who had his heart broken. I am a guy who hates his hometown. I’m a country boy, I’m a city girl. I’m a slut. I’m addicted to cocaine. It’s a song, man.

guooey:

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One of the most important things I have learned today..

arcticarthropod:

atlas-prime:

vizual-vibe:

These mushrooms releasing spores

The girls are

Fertilizing

The shapes that air makes are just so good

pettyprocrastination:

mankind creating q-tips and then saying we shouldn’t put them in our ears is like god putting the male g-spot up the ass and then saying gay sex is a sin

akumeoy:

theyrezi:

[video description: a man playing saxophone in front of a large pipe. everything he plays echoes back through the pipe, resulting in a call-and-response type song. the person behind the camera claps along to the beat. end description.]

a reasonable society would base their entire economy around this

meatfighter:

meatfighter:

meatfighter:

Come get this dick-fil-a

I’m tired of y'all reblogging this every Sunday

One of you shit heads are saving this post and waiting until Sunday to reblog it


I will fucking find you

bufifty:

She’s art